{♥}

Tuesday, May 08, 2012

who you are - and who people think you are.

yes, that's fearless. oh, how much do i want to be fearless.

prone to escapism sometimes. i run away, i hide, i block things out. if running from the ghosts is equivalent to 2.4km, i bet i'll pass easily! hah!

& i still believe in the good. isn't it easier to live and breathe? believing that there is something good in everyone, in everything? it still makes more sense to me, no matter what happens!

& crying is really therapeutic. but i certainly hope i dont need so much therapies! but there is always a safety net who is always there to catch you when you stumble and fall. do you see the people who are willing to stand by you? i see the people who are willing to support me, and i sincerely thank God for them.

seeing pretty lights makes me happy! spending time with people makes me happy! smsing nonsensical stuff to friends makes me happy! having random vendors/clients mis-spelling my name/calling me dear (yes, it really happens!) makes me happy - honestly, who goes around emailing people Hi dear when you have never met before? specially taking leave today to spend time with my mummy makes me happy! preparing gifts makes me happy! what doesnt make me happy? wrapping gifts. but knowing people have trouble unwrapping my gifts gives me a sense of achievement - the now-you-know-how-i-died-wrapping-it feeling hahahahaha!

ohgosh. im so eccentric!

want the best of both worlds.

it isn't as difficult as it sounds

Paradise is always where love is.

Sunday, April 29, 2012

what do you fear? & hold dear?

everyone has a past. i think i display symptoms of escapism when it comes to certain areas. but, the past should make us better, rather than bitter right? and hatred is self-destructive. i think in conversations, we talked about who we hate! but, i honestly dont think i hate anyone. probably just sorely disappointed in certain decisions made by people.

i refuse to let my past hinder my present. i will be strong. (: i fear for my family & loved ones' health. and perhaps, i dont hate anyone, but i really do hate cancer and illness. Huiqing, be strong. pray, and have faith.

its always a choice. sometimes easy, sometimes difficult. but i think crying is sometimes therapeutic! & in a way, it makes you stronger. oh, and apparently, crying moisturizes your eyes too! read that in some medical magazine!

(L)

JIAYOU (:

hahahahahahah! & i love surprises (: i actually met my former Principal at a class gathering ytd! the organizer's dad was having a Uni gathering concurrently! & my former P attended that gathering (: he's even more grandpa-ish now :D heh! what are the chances of that happening?!!?

& i love teasing shy guys. oh my gosh, its really very interesting! their reactions i mean! hahahah!

& i realise if speaking to your former Principal was so difficult and needed so much courage.. how much courage would it take to confess and fight for someone?

& everyone is weird (;

We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.

- Dr Seuss

Saturday, April 14, 2012

to the things unseen,

bright and sunny day! (: i hope it will be windy! then it will be a perfect day! :D

worrying, its so useless. it doesnt get you anywhere! but we still worry, dont we? trust that everything is going to be fine. trust that youll get by. wait, everything is going to be just great! (;

i really dont like the fact that work is taking up so much of my time! i prob will stop working in Jul.. more time for friends & family? :D

still remembered how amazed i was at the sight of bubbles at The Central in Dec/Jan! so pretty! going to revisit childhood and play with them later! :D hehh

good thing about work? it occupies me! & it gives me allowance to spend. but, its so time-consuming! and im taking forever to learn all the different odd admin/secretarial stuff in the office! and i dont get time to read! ): thats really depressing. i miss reading already! maybe i shall go by the library tml or sth (: just thinking about it makes me happy! :D

what makes you happy?

Sunday, March 25, 2012

heart of gratitude,

i think, regardless what happens, life is still beautiful. there is good in everyday life. always.

be grateful. be contented. be happy! (:
you cant have everything. but you can make the best out of everything that you have! (;

& i know i have alot (: yes, there are troubles. there will be rocky times. there will be disappointments and tears and angry words. but, i do have my lovely friends, safe home, and a wonderful boyfriend. and a really faithful God.

pretty. they look more like art than umbrellas! i think creation is absolutely amazing. create beautiful things. not hurtful and angry words.

the simplest things can be made so pretty.

met up with Amanda on Friday! the very first time i met up with her alone since, the time i knew her! &partly from the nerves (H& S will totally get what i mean-- additional cheers to them who gave me moral support! i really have fantastic friends. what did i do to deserve them? all you people are so fab. really touched) we talked about anything and everything! hahahahaha! and she needs to gain back weight...... lol!

i think? Monday to Thursday will be family time (: Friday will be friends time. Saturday and Sunday morning/early afternoon will be boyfriend time. Sunday late afternoon would be me-time. Night time and Early morning are prayer/ quiet time (:
work has a way of putting things into a different perspective for me (:

he makes me feel so loved (: so darned thankful.

feel it.

i know that feeling. im usually happy. but that doesnt mean im free from all sorts of problems!

i do (:

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Darling don't be afraid

(: honestly.

does he know that he can make my day simply with a morning sms? (: esp when he sneaked me a sms ytd (:

restless night! kicked things off my bed during my sleep-- okayyy time to pack my bed ): and you just bought a top and a dress ytd! need to pack le! :D shopping round2 tml? :D

hehe my birthday present from my parents (: its almost 5months late, but idc, i love it! :D there's another watch, with a sweet pink watch face :D love it too! :D and the price of these two watches is comparable to the price of this particular Ellesse watch i fell in love with! omg. thank God i din ask my parents to buy when i first set my sights on that watch!

delayed gratification? :D

i really am thankful for my parents and family (: i love them so much (: and im really lucky to have them! i know, when all else fails, and i need comfort and help, they will always be there (: (: it struck me so clearly last night when i was disappointed.

xin qing mei mei now :D compared to last night, well, a huge difference! :D

funny how the cause of one's disappointment can make everything go away so simply. cause& effect?

hahahahhaha reminded me of what i told D jokingly the other day, you break it (my heart), you heal it!!! (: wonder how we came to talking about that!

photography is really fun. even taking photos with my brother's (super-good) camera phone, and then editing with some app :D okay, confession, i really love black-and-white alot! it might be an obsession! lol!

besides, photographs bring back memories (: truckloads of them!

and, negativity! go away! you are not wanted in my life.

which is true (: and reading is really an awesome leisurely activity! :D hope i still have time to indugle in that once i pass my job interview and start work! please offer me 1300 and i'll definitely accept!

sometimes, its easier said than done! but try! :D it really isnt that difficult after all

just some comfort and warmth..

hahahahaha i actually laughed when i first read this! lol!

as a kid, i was really terrified of the dark sometimes! lol! even now, i hate to watch horror movies. gives me the creeps. which i know is the intended effect but

i miss my boyfriend. esp difficult when he has this field camp where i cannot hear from him at all! what's more tragic? being able to contact yet you dont contact one another? or being unable to contact yet youre dying to contact one another? almost equally.

Saturday, March 03, 2012

colors and promises.

(:
right now, i shall dream about my future, discover what i like, explore the available options and believe i can do it. im really scared. it's almost as if im taking my a levels all over again! that uncertain and helpless feeling. and coming from me, i gues it could be weird.

DARE TO DREAM. CARPE DIEM (seize the day)
pray. ms N as well as C reminded me to do that (: and. right, dont worry about the Uni tuition fees. tell me how that is possible? im earnest and honestly interested in that course, please give me the scholarship. i swear i dont do slipshod work!

dont ever give up. that's what defines failure. if you fall and stay there, refusing to try again, will you grow and learn?

& really. im not perfect you know. i do get scared. and stressed. hearing I'll-see-you-on-stage-later doesnt actually reassures me! i do have the fear of failure. fear of letting people down. and perhaps, even stronger.

thats what i do! hope. hope for the best. (: many things are beyond our control! as my tour guide likes to say, smile! be happy! regardless of your mood and what (terrible) things which happened to you, the day will still pass! a discouraged person will find his troubles increasing, while a cheerful person will find solutions and opportunities in situations!

which is true. the earth doesnt stop revolving just bcos of you!

i wonder.. if my logic makes sense. cos i know sometimes it doesnt! hahahah just ask my friends!

yes.
am i a happy person? hahahaha i think im quite normal leh! :D ms C seems to have a theory on why im a happy person! hahahah!
my boyfriend was trying to prove it. he said laugh? and i start laughing! hahahahaah! i think i laugh everyday! J said she laughs at all my jokes (what? i joke? lololol) & D and i laugh at like, everything and anything! hahahah at some parts of This Means War (even Harry Potter), no one else was laughing but the two of us! :D
good times.am i happy bcos of the good things in my life? or good things are in my life bcos im happy? this is like the chicken-and-egg-which-comes-first situation! i see good in everything, and it makes life good! and perhaps bcos life is good, i see everything (mostly) in rose-tinted glasses! mentality goes a long way!
&everyone has his own battles to fight. you arent the only one feeling that way.

so pretty.
i love art&craft. i love creating and designing things when i feel like it. and i guess, that's why i dont have the confidence and passion to opt for Design courses! like i told my mother, when the mood strikes or when i feel like making gifts, i'll really enjoy myself! but to design and create for work? on a daily basis?

would you?
i wouldnt. there are things that happen which i absolutely hate. i would want everyone i love to be healthy and alive. but i guess, things always happen for a reason. one thing leads to another! butterfly effect?
contentment!

open your eyes, open your heart. you arent alone.

how the mind and heart works. always a mystery (:

you can have the sky if you want to,

Friday, February 17, 2012

Above All Else.

positive thinking goes a long way (: you've absolutely no idea.

:D
anw, im so used to BlackBerry! im not sure what phone i wna change to! ohnoz, there might be a chance i would cont using BlackBerry! creature of habit!? -with a pinch of impulse sometimes!

yummm (: cruise (Royal Caribbean) supposedly has great food! :D hmm my weight.. hmm..! :D

what solution is there when im not in sg and youre in sg? sigh. tsk. ohwell. i hope you love your gifts (: i nearly died preparing them! you've no idea. hahahahahahah!

hehe D has a really awesome way of replying me! hahahaah! i really hope her entire life would be a smooth journey (: but there will be bumps along the way D:

addio, amore mio

hahaahahh! why is "my" at the back? mhmmm!

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

whirlpool of emotions. do you see the heart? or the single person/thorns? i guess, perception matters!

i feel loved by my family, my boyfriend and my special knit of friends (called my/the clique!) pretty much, quite easily! hahahahah! a simple comment, a simple sentence in a sms.. that could be all it takes to make my day (:

me instead of anything else? you above all else. (yes, i've better language! heh)

i've been feeling that recently, my parents are showing more display of affection :D heh! telling us every week that they are going pa tor! :D &ytd?! my mum always lay on the bed really close to my dad whenever i sit on their bed! ytd, i asked why, my mum said "I KNOW WHY! YOU GOT MAGNETISM, ATTRACT ME OVER!" *poke my dad* hahahahahhah! we laughed like mad! &when i told my boyf, we laughed like mad all over agn lol!

morbid thought (the image). i know. but i genuinely feel that way! &esp if theres a death scene in wtv-show-i-was-watching-w-my-family!

dont worry if youre single (: dont worry if youre facing problems and all. have faith that better things are coming (: (:

i wonder if our boyfriends sneeze like mad ytd, seeing how much we talked about them! met up with my primary school friend! a fraction of all that we've talked about revolved around r/s etc. heh she's envious of the "honeymoon" period of r/s! well, i've nvr had a r/s which is 3years old so.. cant say i could understand entirely! she says her birthday (in Feb) is celebrated with valentines! hahahahah and we celebrate our birthdays separately even tho they are both in October!
*shakes head* we both agree we dk how her boyf got the $$ for all her gifts! hahaha!

so prettyyyy! so envious of his/her culinary skills! ):

dont you think that.. in a way, life is like baking? you find a recipe- try it out! &subsequently, you adjust it slightly as you make mistakes and learn.

i love these pictures. (:

today is gna be a great day (: so what if im alone on valentines? really, shouldnt valentines be everyday? do you treat your loved one well on just that one day out of 365?